Chronic Illness

May Thoughts

May will soon be over, but I wanted to try writing about the prompts from A Chronic Voice. Having many chronic illnesses puts me in a position to think about anything for hours at a time. Thinking too much can be a good thing or a bad thing. Here are my thoughts on these May Prompts.

Regrouping – I think of people regrouping after a massive failure. How many times have I regrouped in life? I could never count this, but I can remember going through a regrouping process as a child. It’s a little bit like closure. It’s like a new season; you know, how a new season makes you feel new?

Whenever I’ve had a failure or crisis, I would take an assessment of the facts, or at least the facts as I saw them. Then, I was eager to regroup. The definition speaks of organizing or reassembling. Starting over always included an organizing of my situation and sorting it all out so that I could start over. This process brings me excitement and renewal of mental energy.

Investigating – I would like to say again that I’m no longer investigating my numerous illnesses. Each time I was diagnosed with something new, an immediate investigation of the disease began. I furiously searched google for anything that seemed to legitimately offer me any understanding of what I was facing.

Not long ago, I decided to stop this process and try to go on with my life, whatever it may be. This seemed easy at the time, because it seemed like the doctors had exhausted their thrust for testing me for all the things that were related to my primary diseases. But, out of the blue, new problems have arrived to bring me pain and worry. My broken shoulder and rehabilitation has been long and hard. This break may well be called a fragility break, because I didn’t have an extreme accident to cause it.

Now, the doctors are worried about my bone strength. Two years ago, my bone density scan showed that I have Osteopenia (early bone loss). Today was the new bone density scan. When I finished, I noticed that the technician had circled spots on my hip bones with a red marker. I’m now dreading the test results. Osteoporosis will probably be in my future, and brings with it a bad bone prognosis.

water

Boosting – Boosting is really helpful when feeling down from pain and constant sickness. I think about boosting of my spirit when I’m feeling low. I feel a boost when Hubby brings me flowers for no reason. Something beautiful can provide a boost that mentally and physically drives me to keep trying. I think I’ll need some type of boost after I go to the dentist tomorrow for the repair of my cracked crown.

Setting – What type of setting inspires you? We all have a certain environment that gives us inspiration to keep fighting. When you remain isolated at home because of your illness, it can be very hard to live in a setting that brings you peace or joy. Creating beautiful surroundings can definitely improve your mood, ability to be creative, and feel inspired to never quit fighting.

I long for beautiful surroundings with a feminine backdrop. I find flowers, floral fabrics, and cheerful colors very inspiring. When we suffer daily, it’s really important to try and enjoy our surroundings and let them be a part of emotional healing and encouragement. Everyone has a setting that revives them: nature, water, sunshine, or even rain.

Reviving – I believe that the setting discussion ran right into this prompt: reviving. In fact, all of the prompts led me to this word. I love the feeling of being revived. I think, when you hurt all the time, longing for the emotion of reviving is natural.

Sharing the down times can be the key to coming to terms with your pain and then the renewal can come. Journaling, counseling, or even blogging can bring about the sense of reviving the spirit. Everyone who has chronic illness hopes to be revived and rejuvenated in their long journey.

@2019, copyright Lisa Ehrman

4 Comments

  • Sheryl

    Thank for joining us again, Lisa, lovely thoughts here! You’re so right about the surroundings…it’s a little difficult for me because my pet birds are horribly messy in an apartment! 😉 But I’m in the process of decluttering as well which should help. Sending hugs.

    • hkviv

      Thanks for the great linky. Decluttering is so hard when you don’t feel well and lack energy, but it sure helps our minds to relax. We’ve been doing a lot of that, too. We’re moving soon, and decluttering also means less stuff to pack. Hope that you get things the way that you want soon.

  • Amanda

    I’m sorry to hear of your worries about the osteopenia developing into full-blown osteoporosis. I found out I had osteopenia a few years ago but haven’t had another scan since, and know the fear that comes with wondering whether it’s getting worse or not. Here’s hoping you’re not waiting too long for the results, as I think the not knowing is the hardest part sometimes.

  • hkviv

    I think waiting is the hardest, too. I hope when you get your next scan, that the osteopenia won’t have progressed.

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