I’m happy to join A Chronic Voice in her monthly prompts. As chronic-illness bloggers, we value each other in the ways we can learn and grow reading about each others’ experiences. April has been a trying month so far, but I look forward to better days.
I do truly marvel at the unbelievable roadblocks that stop people with chronic illness from receiving medical help! I marvel at the horrible effects caused by our countries healthcare system. Because I’m no longer able to work, I must purchase private insurance from the marketplace. Because the good insurance companies pulled out of my region, I’m left with only one company. This company is local and limits everything. I have high deductibles and almost no choices of doctors.
Having many chronic diseases, I need to see specialists, which are out-of-network. I must meet 14,000 in deductibles before these doctors are considered in network. So, to get good health care, I must pay out-of-pocket. I marvel that there are no rheumatologists in my network, and no dermatologists who will take new patients.
I’m marvelling at the fact that to see a doctor who can diagnose me, I must travel out of state, and pay this in full. I marvel in the fact that doctors just don’t give a rip.
Because of medical bills piling up, we can’t really splurge. But, hubby was so sweet this weekend. He went out and got me a beautiful rose! My favorite roses are pink, and he knew I needed cheering up. After I had talked to my do-nothing doctor, I was pretty much a basket case. When biopsies say “cancer”, I want to see some action. So, this little splurge was lovely.
I’m continuing to pray. My emotional state is ugly. I live in constant pain and have severe fatigue, but doctors are putting me off. My sjogren’s diagnosis has been delayed until June. I’m a person who doesn’t like to argue with doctors, and I usually play-down the seriousness of my condition. I don’t mean to do this, but because of my upbringing I just do it anyway. Now that my (chronicillness) back is against the wall, I have to come out fighting for myself.
Going against a doctor’s wishes or getting a second opinion is nerve-wracking for me. I’ve been shaking all morning, because doing this makes me a nervous wreck. I started the process for a second opinion and will continue to fight to get it.
Balancing life is so hard when you aren’t functioning. Physical activities don’t get done very often. Hubby and I were trying to organize the garage. I sit at a table and he brings me boxes to go through. If I get up and down myself, I can’t work without a full- day of rest. I guess I balance my life as much as I can.
After investing more money in my blogging business last year, it really didn’t pay off. I would like to pursue this side of blogging more, but there is no money. As long as my health-care is so expensive, the money goes there.
@2018, copyright Lisa Ehrman