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Yesterday I had to drive my husband to an eye exam. After he broke his glasses in a bad fall, he needed new pair. I felt terrible, but was able to drive him there. It was a Walmart optical office, so I walked in the store to look for an Easter gift for my grandchild. I was only in there for 5 minutes when the pain became severe.

I hobbled back to the office where I could sit down. My lower back pain was killing me and I regretted my short adventure in shopping. What started as a routine eye exam soon became more serious. The doctor spotted a retinal tear in one eye. This was on the same side where he hit the ground and received a concussion.

Since trauma can cause a retinal tear, we are guessing this is when it occurred. His vision hasn’t been affected, but it’s still scary. He’ll have to be driven to the city so that the doctor can use a laser to repair his tear. He’s nervous, obviously. I’m also very nervous, because I can’t afford to have an allergic reaction that morning. He’s counting on me to drive.

With the daily allergic reactions, all I know to do is to get back on my full dose of prednisone and try to prevent that from happening. If I wake up needing Benadryl, I’ll be too drowsy to safely drive in big city traffic. Life with chronic illness really stinks!

I wish that I could be dependable, but I’m not. I’ll just do everything possible to prevent letting him down. If all else fails, he’ll have a very expensive taxi charge. I hope that it won’t happen, because he needs my emotional support.


It would be easier if we lived closer to family members that could step in and help us. My daughter has tried to get us to move closer to her, so that she could help us when we need it. I guess with my poor health and my husband’s new and numerous health problems, this would be a good idea. We’re just praying that we make the right decisions.

Making decisions when you’re all messed up with brain fog and pain, can be tricky. Not only do we have to weigh the pros and cons of today, we don’t know what tomorrow will bring. When I was young and healthier (functioning, at least), I didn’t think that life would get to this point before I even reached the age of 60.

So, we’ll just take our time making decisions, getting lots of advice from others, and praying. For today, we’ll just do the best we can.

@2022, copyright Lisa Ehrman

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  1. Hope you find a solution. It must be so difficult. My husband built us a small apartment attached to my son’s house. It’s on 14 acres, so my hubby has a garage and can tinker, and I can garden to my heart’s content. We had to give up some privacy, and at times we forget that while we are parents, my son is grown and has his own ideas. We need to let him be. It might not be the best solution, but at our age (62 & 64) it’s the best one we can come up with. Unless we win the lottery.

    1. I think that sounds like it has so many Pros and less Cons. It’s so true that we have to let our grown children think for themselves. I hope you have a wonderful garden this spring 🙂

  2. That sounds like such a scary situation you were in. I hope your husband is able to be properly helped with his retina tear. Eye pain can be excruciating. Becoming ill before our “time” is so devastating. May you and your family make the best decisions for you all as you work on what would be advantageous.

    1. Thank you! Hopefully by this time tomorrow, he’ll have great results from the eye procedure.

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