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This rainy, cold day makes for winter misery. I love looking at a grey winter day, but it’s the kind of day that often hurts. And, today is one of those days. It feels like everything is throbbing.

Fibromyalgia pain points are very sensitive. If I touch the spots my skin hurts. Any pressure on them makes it feel like I’ve been hit with hammers. My lower back throbs even though I’m resting. My neck pain has created a headache that went from back to front.

Cold Rain

Adding a couple of Tylenol is probably going to do nothing. Now that I’ve cut out Advil I’m just having to try and survive all the pain. I take all the right drugs for Fibromyalgia, but it just doesn’t stop the pain. Duloxetine and muscle relaxers can do a little, and the new addition of Low-Dose Naltrexone gave me a lot of relief from fatigue.

But because I’m having a flare, the medicines don’t cut it. Pain is just what I have to deal with. In June I’ll get to meet a pain doctor who specializes in fibromyalgia pain, but June is a long time from now. She might not help me anyway.

When I was told I had fibromyalgia years ago I didn’t really believe it. As the years went on, I was diagnosed with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome, Sjogren’s Syndrome, Osteoarthritis and more. It’s hard to know what disorder is causing the pain I have, but it doesn’t really matter. Pain is pain.

It’s a new year and after 2020 I was hoping that there could be something good this year. It doesn’t look like it will be anything good, health-wise. The last decade has brought me nothing but bad health news. More pain, more fatigue, and more new diseases on my list.

coffee and book

January will soon be coming to an end and time doesn’t slow down. It doesn’t slow down no matter if we are full of energy or have the energy of a sloth. Our bodies sometimes cause us to miss days or even weeks. It’s easy to get down when you can’t do anything because of pain, brain-fog, and fatigue.

It’s important for me to try and remember that each day is significant and so am I. I know that even on bad days I can listen, pray, and usually write. Today was a good day because I was alive and had family here to help me. Although I sometimes want to be alone when I feel bad, it’s good to know that family is willing to be supportive.

More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. Romans 5:3-5

@2021, copyright Lisa Ehrman

Disclaimer: I’m not a medical expert. This post contains my opinion only, and is not meant to be taken as medical advice. If you have a medical concern, please consult your personal physician.

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