What Will I Do Next?

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After being home for about 10 hours, my itching flare returned. I’m not sure why I didn’t have to live on Benadryl while staying in a hotel and eating so much junk food. I was sleeping on sheets that weren’t washed with organic soap and had the dog in the bed with us. I’ll be seeing the Immunologist again, but I wonder if there is anyone who can figure this out.

cat scratching

This new doctor isn’t sure that I really have Mast Cell disorder, but am severly sensitive to things around me. This doctor said that it’s really not anaphylaxis unless my throat closes up. I don’t know what to do, but will give this doc a chance to try and help me. I’ve tried many things: stopping certain foods and then introducing them one at a time and didn’t really go all the way with that plan.

I’m now taking the MCAS protocol (Zyrtec, Famotidine, and Montelukast), which isn’t stopping or helping these flares. I’ve changed unscented soaps and have tried most of the ones available. I moisturize. It’s not caused by anxiety or stress, because I have reactions when I’m stressed and when I’m not stressed.

There is probably no certain fix for all these rashes and itching so I’ll need to accept this part of my life. When I had the MCAS diagnosis, at least I knew that there was a name for it. Since the doctor has introduced Hydroxyzine, I thought maybe there was a lessening of the dreaded itch. The prescription is to increase the dosage until I reach 4 tablets at bedtime. Tonight I’ll be starting 3 pills.

Although I moisturize, my fingers have 11 cuts on them. They burn, itch, and hurt. I’ve tried all the prescriptions and using Neosporin breaks my hands out in tiny blisters. Then I remembered that years ago, I had these skin problems and soaked the skin with apple cider vinegar.

I hate doing it because it burns like fire, but then it starts to heal. The cuts begin to seal and I’m so glad that I finally remembered this help.

I’m using ice packs (spaced out) and it feels good on the joint pain. I’m massaging the calf muscles which also seems to help. Hubby gave me a massage and a scratching session. Then, I stayed up most of the night doing all those things over and over. Finally, the morning doses added by the Tizanidine caused me to finally go to sleep.

Holidays and traveling are so special. When I was healthy, I could work so hard to create delicious meals and treats. It hurt my back some, but this pain is so much worse. I have felt like I wish I was in the hospital with IV’s giving me constant anti-histamines and pain medicine. My body will probably get better and if it gets worse I will then go to the hospital.

I never knew how blessed I was to celebrate holidays without physical limitations. No one could understand our limitations unless they experience them. Even my children don’t often seem to understand how bad I feel……hypochondriac? My youngest is the sympathetic one and he became that way when he was a tot who had many health problems.

It’s nice that we can express our feelings online with much better understanding. We can feel each other’s physical pain, if we have had the same type. We can somewhat feel the emotional pain that comes every morning. It’s hard to not feel sorry for myself, even though I try not to.

Times like now bring me to wonder if I’m going to die soon. I don’t want to die, but I just don’t know how much I can deal with. I’ll continue to pray Ps 34:18, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit”

I’ll pray that we can all have less pain and more joy.

@2020, copyright Lisa Ehrman

Disclaimer: I’m not a medical expert. This post contains my opinions and experiences and is not meant to be taken as medical advice. If you have a medical concern, please consult your personal physican.

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